LOLA TALKS

Lola is Málaga’s Carrie Bradshaw. She’s out and about in the streets of Málaga blogging about anything from shoes to shopping, from business to bums. Keep up to date with her thoughts by following the Inglés Málaga blog.

WHERE ARE THE BARGAINS?

Every body is talking about their New Year’s resolutions. I have the same resolution every single New Year: “Don´t go to the Sales before I have reduced my bottom”. However, because I go to the Sales when they are nearly finished, I never pick up a bargain and my bottom is still fat.

This year my resolution was to go to the Sales early. So last week I spent all the time walking from one shop to another, but, I still couldn’t find any bargains. There weren’t any clothes left in the shops and on Friday my ‘dander was getting up’. I ask myself: “Where is the crisis?”. I think that politicians should cut up our credit cards. Even mine, for the fact that I can´t buy anything and my husband will be happier.

Have you picked up a bargain?

TO UNTIE OR NOT TO UNTIE? – THAT’S THE QUESTION
I realized that although I untie my shoes every single time I take them off, my four children never do it. They take their shoes off without untying their laces. And if you ask them why they don´t untie their shoes, they say that it´s a waste of time. Oh my god, they are pulling my leg, they have all the time in the world to do it.
Now I think about it, I did the same when I was a child and also as a teenager. So, I think that age is what determines whether you untie or don´t untie your shoes when you take them off instead of the time you have. Do you kick your trainers off?

A BANG FOR YOUR BUCK

There are a lot of ways to save money. Every body gives the same advice when the Sales begin: “buy only what you need”. I know what you are thinking about: “That´s nonsense, I need everything I want”. I have my own theory. It´s: “think as if you don´t have any money in your bank account or in your pocket, neither on your credit card, and so forth”. No money, no shopping.

Also, when you go shopping you will see if you have got the bang for your buck. Nonsense again, you only by bargains, don´t you?

As you can see, a circle will never fit into a square!

WHAT STYLE OF PANTIES DO YOU WEAR?

Well, I know there´s a lot of types of panties but if you take a look in my drawer you´ll find one type of panties: briefs. I like them because they have a lot of advantages:

they are comfortable
you can use them in different situations
the style options that you can find on the market are almost limitless
they are perfect for those days of the month

A lot of women think that they are for old women, or that they bunch up under jeans, or that you have panty lines. Never mind, I prefer to have panty lines instead of wearing a thong. I can´t imagine myself in undies wearing a thong. You can be cute wearing romantic laced briefs.

HOW TO ‘LICK VALENTINE’S DAY INTO SHAPE’!

It´s easy to find an affordable gift for men, you only need to think like them. This year, for Valentine´s Day, I made use of The Sales and bought a designer shirt and tie.

I know, it´s not an awesome present but the way I gave it was fantastic. I went to bed wearing the shirt and tie. You can imagine the face of my husband when he arrived in the bedroom and looked at me: he was shocked!

I really don´t know if he liked the two presents, and I’m sure if I asked him about the colour of the shirt, he couldn’t answer me. But the important is that we both enjoyed the situation. As you see, I didn´t need to break my budget and it ‘licked Valentine’s day into shape’.

WHY YOU SHOULD USE YOUR TONGUE AND HAND AT THE SAME TIME!

It’s well-known that women talk a lot, and it’s also well-known that women can do more than one thing at the same time. Well, I know women that break this stereotype.

One is my house cleaner, if I ask her something while she is working she stops, stands up looking at me and only spends the time talking. It drive me nuts and I have to say to her: ‘Please, pipe down and continue with your work.’

I’ve another friend that is in the same sewing class as me. When she starts talking she stops sewing and half an hour before the class finishes she decides to go because she hasn’t made any progress.

I say: ‘Of course, you haven’t progressed, you can’t talk and sew at the same time, so don’t be so chatty and you’ll sew more. What do you think?

HOW CAN YOU HAVE SORENESS IN YOUR MUSCLES

Every single “White Week” we go skiing. I started skiing just eight years ago, so as you can imagine that my style of skiing is not as good as I would like. Thank God, although my skiing level is not very high I have never broken any bones, but certainly after skiing I always have sore muscles. You know: arms, legs and so forth. It’s true that I’m not in good shape.

This year I discovered a new muscle in my lower leg: the anterior tibialis muscle. It started to hurt a few days after I finished skiing. When I noticed it I sent a text to my skiing instructor telling him that I have a pain in a part of my body that I never knew existed, with my typical British humour. Oh my God, he answered me that it was because I skied well. He could’ve fooled me. But the key factors which cause muscle soreness are skiing badly and / or not being in good shape. As if this weren’t enough he also said that he had soreness in all his body. Perhaps he thought that he could impress me but, whatever, as the song says “that don’t impress me much”.

HITTING THE 40’s

When I hit the 40s, I began to feel different. Not really bad or ill, only strange. My gynaecologist told me that this was a very common feeling for women in their 40s. Now that I’m about to hit mid 40s and I don’t care anymore about these feelings I have another problem. When I look at myself in the mirror I see my face in my mother’s body, and I’m not exaggerating.

My fattiness is moving to my waist, hips and rear. And now I have rolls of fat around my tummy. I look like a woman with a rubber ring under her clothes. I know that the problems are age and hormones because I have weighed the same for 7 years, more or less. But, if these rolls of fat increase my husband is going to be dead from the waist down. I hope that it won’t be till the fat lady sings so that I can take steps.